December 11 – 11 Things

by admin on 12/10/2010 in Prompts

December 11 – 11 Things

What are 11 things your life doesn’t need in 2011? How will you go about eliminating them? How will getting rid of these 11 things change your life?

So, now I have to make a list?  I was an English major, for cryin’ out loud.  Bullet points are NOT in my thing.   I am too long-winded.  I feel compelled to explain, rationalize or justify every point.

I won't! I won't! I won't!

 

How about I just write a paragraph about how I would film the opening chapter of As I Lay Dying or something?

Oh, sure.  I could put together a list of drivel about peace, love & harmony; but, that’s not going to ring true to me or to anyone that knows me.  Yeah, sweetness & light I’m not.   As I get deeper into this whole reverb10 thing, I find my level of discomfort increasing.  Is that because I am not used to this level of soul-searching?  Is it because I find that others tend to post things that are repeatedly held up as lovely, inspirational, soaring, brave, etc., and I’m still trying to find my voice?  Am I worried that I’ll be judged wrong in some way?

Yep.  And nope.  See what I did there? 

Initially, when I started this project, I turned to others for examples.  When you’re writing muscle is so drastically atrophied, it’s pretty hard to ask it to flex up again.  So, I looked at other responses, read the retweets and praises that others were sending out into the world.  My first several posts were how I thought I was supposed to post.  Although they were direct responses to the reverb10 prompts, and what I said was essentially true, they weren’t very honest. 

My real self is not nearly so staid.  I’m much more irreverent, probably a lot less politically correct, and increasingly averse to some of the feel good-y posting that seems to be required.  It’s probably not nice to say that when I read through some of the posts, in my head, I start hearing “dingle, dingle” music.  You, know…the kind of wind-chimey stuff that you hear in spas, or that make you think Sedona sounds like.  Do these people have crystals hanging everywhere?  I get the feeling that most of these folks are posting what they want the world to think that they are…soulful, yoga-ing, tea drinkers that read Maya Angelou for fun.

I have a feeling that, like me, they are SUV driving, Starbucks drinking, football or soccer moms that struggle to get the laundry done in one day, yell at their kids and try to figure out what to throw on the table for dinner that doesn’t take longer than thirty minutes.  In between trips to the grocery store, the crafts store (for yet another school project due on Tuesday,) sports practices, dentist appointments and client meetings, they try to find something that makes them sound less like every other 40-something surburban woman and more like the artistic, graceful, world-travelled culture maven they thought they’d be when they grew up.

So rather than make a list of eleven things, I’m just going to make a list of one.  I guess that’s not really a list.  It’s just a statement.  A proclamation. 

I’m gonna keep answering prompts; but, I’m going to do it on my terms. 

Screw ’em if I can’t make a joke.

So, there!

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